50 questions to ask your grandparents while you still can

Before you ask

A good question is small and specific. "Tell me about your life" leaves most people quiet. "What was the first thing you bought with your own money?" gets a story right away.

A few things help:

• Ask one question and wait. The pause is where the story comes from.
• Ask in a comfortable place, over coffee or a short drive.
• Record it on a phone, or write down their words as they say them.
• Do not correct the details. Follow the story where it goes.
• If they tell a story twice, that is a gift. Ask what they remember most about it.

Growing up

1. Where were you born, and what do you know about that day?
2. What is your earliest memory?
3. What was the house you grew up in like?
4. What did a normal day look like when you were a child?
5. What did you get in trouble for?
6. Who was your best friend, and what did you do together?
7. What was your favorite meal growing up, and who made it?
8. What chores did you have?
9. What did you want to be when you grew up?
10. What was school like for you?

Family

1. What do you remember about your own grandparents?
2. What is something your mother did that you still think about?
3. What is something your father taught you?
4. How did you meet your husband or wife?
5. What was your wedding day like?
6. What was it like when your first child was born?
7. What is a tradition from your childhood that you kept going?
8. Who in the family do you think I am most like?

Work and money

1. What was your first job?
2. What was the first thing you bought with your own money?
3. What was the hardest job you ever had?
4. What was the best boss or teacher you ever had?
5. What did you learn from a hard season?
6. What did a good day's work look like to you?

Places and times

1. Where have you lived, and which place felt most like home?
2. What was the first car you owned?
3. What was your favorite place to go as a child?
4. What was it like the first time you traveled far from home?
5. What do you remember about a big moment in history, and where were you?
6. How has the town where you grew up changed?

Faith and what matters

1. What do you believe, and how did you come to believe it?
2. When did you feel most grateful?
3. What is something that carried you through a hard time?
4. What is a prayer or a song that means a lot to you?
5. What would you want your grandchildren to know about how you lived?

Looking back

1. What are you proudest of?
2. What is a day you would live again?
3. What is something you wish people asked you more often?
4. What is something you changed your mind about?
5. What is a mistake that taught you something?
6. What made you laugh the hardest?
7. What is the best advice you ever got?
8. What advice would you give me?
9. What do you hope the family remembers about you?
10. What was the happiest time of your life?
11. What did you dream about when you were young?
12. What is a recipe you hope we keep making?
13. What is something you have kept all these years, and why?
14. What do you want us to know that we have never asked?
15. Which family story do you hope we never forget?

After the conversation

Write down the date, the place and who was there. Add one line about how it felt. Small details are the first to fade.

Keep what you hear

A shoebox of notes is a start. A private home where the stories, photos and voices sit together is better. That is what EMBR Story Studio is for. You can see how it works or join the waitlist.